Feb 9, 2017

Men, women - It's valentine's day again

As I roll in my sheets all alone, a week before Valentine's day, I remember once again how much I hate that day. 

In fact, I have never enjoyed celebrating Valentine's day and never understood people who enjoyed it. 

Maybe because I always aimed for a relationship full of care, love, attention and romance around the clock. 

I have always cherished the tête-à-tête times a couple spends even when just reading a book or saying nothing. I cherished the random text messages kisses that can reflect the teenage aspect of any adult and yet draw a smile on everyone's face. I cherished the cuddling, the whispers in public, the "I miss you" hug after a long day at work. I cherished the 5 minute chat and the quick good night kiss just as much as I cherished a full day out. Maybe I never cared about Valentine because I never needed my man to prove to me his care on this specific day as long as he was proving it every single day of the rest of the year.

Someone once told me that a person who is single should not preach about relationship and give advises. And another person once told me that I am too ideallistic in my way of defining love and relationships that I sure am not genuine enough. But with Valentine coming again this year I still insist on my definition of love and see it as perfect as it might ever be!

But before beginning, let's not confuse love with falling inlove. Love is deeper than falling in-love and sharing a feeling of lust towards someone. Love comes from the mind and controls the heart, while being in-love controls only the heart without any logic whatsoever.

What is love? 

As I said it many times before... Love is loving an imperfect person, perfectly. It is knowing the other’s flaws and accepting them without feeling the urge and need to fix them. Love is believing no one is perfect, including oneself.  Love is looking above one's flaws and appreciating the good he spreads. Love is being able not to let go, even when you want to the most. Love is holding the other person still when that person is letting go. Love is sticking around at the hardest times and even when pushed away because that's when you need to prove your care the most.  Love is standing still, no matter what. Love is not needing to do an effort to impress the person in front of you, it’s wanting and desiring to do that effort to make that other person proud. It is not letting go, no matter how hurt you are. It is lusting for a moment in each other’s arms without suffocating in the cheesiness of romance and relationships. Love is trusting blindly, giving effortlessly, feeling lust around the clock.  Love is not searching for someone to complete you; Love is being complete, feeling happy and sensing full without the other person… but still wanting to share the moments with that other person. Love is not suffocating without the other person because love is mature, and at the end of the day no one is ever indispensable. Love is not a need or a desire, it is not just an emotion. What's love? Love is a decision. 

Love is that feeling of care you can desire to share with a person you've known for an hour or a day or a month. It has no knowledge of distance or time and can not be measured in any palpable way.

Love is what Disney taught me when I was young. It is not about happy endings, it is about dreaming. Love is a dream I still believe in at 33.

And Valentine's day? Well love is celebrating it every single day...

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