Dec 27, 2011

Happy 2012!

It’s THAT time of year (again) when we sit to write down the New-Year’s resolutions.  A few days before the beginning of the New-Year, we should all have our list ready (and we’ll follow it, as usual, for one week or 12 after “les 12 coups de minuit”).

Me? I’m no different! But my list, I’ll follow it for the full year of 2012. Yes, I will!
Me? I just want to make a difference…

This New-Year, I will not start it with a diet!
You see, since I want to make a difference and succeed in all my resolutions, I need to be realistic! With all the festivities and my Birthday coming up in the first week of February (save the date people!), I do not want to bluff myself (and everyone around me) and resolve to start a diet (that I will end up failing); therefore, w min el ekhir, I will not start my New-Year with a diet!

In 2012, I will not register at the new Gym…
Just like the (always failed) diet plan, I realize now (it’s mature that I realize, no?) that the money I spend at the beginning of every year on gym registration is lost money; I would rather spend these amount on winter sales shopping; it starts with the New-Year after all, no?

I’m making peace with my old enemy… chocolate!
There is a famous saying that goes: “There is more to life than chocolate, but not right now”.  And I kind of like it.  Therefore, I won’t complicate my life, I’ll simply not give up on chocolate and indulge myself with its bits and pieces anytime and anywhere.  I’ll publicly enjoy my resolution instead of claiming to be on a diet and eat chocolate, in the kitchen, while no one is watching.

In 2012, I am staying away from my family.
The quality time I need is with my son, mom, dad and friends. Why bluff and say I miss my aunt and uncle and can’t stand living without them? I love them, yes. We’re blood related after all.  But the real quality time I need is definitely not with them. So for everyone who fits into that category: so long guys, I’ll see you at weddings and funerals (may they not be many) and for coffee in 2013 perhaps. I might be missing you by then!

I will stop being lazy on my days off!
Instead of sending the full day in bed (when my son is not home of course), I will start doing an effort to move out of bed, with my blanket, to the TV room and watch a full movie without falling asleep! Who can top such energy?

I will start to be creative at work…
You know, handling a newly launched blog and launching my book writing have been such an exhaustion to me in the past few months that I am highly failing to keep it up and be creative at work. And my boss? Oh well, I’m noticing he’s starting to get bored from the same old excuse.  For this, and in order to keep my position at the office, I will make an effort to be more creative with my absence excuses at work; so long to the flat tire and migraine! (for my co-workers who are reading, chill guys… it’s just a joke for the sake of the blog).

I’ll focus on 1 chatting operator when talking to my friends
Seriously now, I, myself, sometimes wonder why I need to message the same person on MSN, BBM, Whatsapp, FB inbox, FB chat and e-mail him/her at the same time to say the same thing! And if helshe doesn’t reply, I would text to make a missed call (to both phone numbers… all Lebanese carry around 2 phone numbers) to grab his/her attention!  This year, all of this will stop, I’ll learn to stick to one and only medium and make the most out of it. Okay, maybe 2 or 3!
In 2012, I won’t worry much.
I’ll read more.
I’ll write more.
I’ll blog more.
I’ll finish my book (yeah right! *whispers my corrector*).
I won’t be moody –no wait, I’ll still be a girl, I got to be moody!-.
I’ll cut my hair.
I’ll grow my hair.
I’ll take-up a new habit.

Okay, I just chose my new habit!
I will, for once, stick to my New-Year resolutions!

Dec 24, 2011

Dear Santa

Dear Santa,

It’s this time of year again where I ask about you and send you a list of the gifts I expect to find under my Christmas tree. So I sit down to write to you, once again, my wish list.

Over the past few years, I realized how bad of a person I can be! I never ask about you or mail you unless it’s Christmas time.  The rest of the year, I forget your existence… well almost! In November I start being a “good girl” to reach Christmas all pure and angelic and receive what I ask for.

But it seems that your definition of “good” and mine do not match, not a little bit… not even at all!

The last thing I received from you, according to my list, was that huge Barbie doll house when I was 10. 

After it you missed the magic make-up kit, the prince charming, the prince charming with a Porsche car, the perfect man, the eternal beauty, the car, the perfect girl-friends, the perfect boy-friend, the million dollars bank account, the winning lottery ticket, the dream job that starts at 12pm and ends at 3pm, the fancy wardrobe, the unlimited shoes collection, etc…

This year, I address you with a very special request: Can you please send me the definition of “good” according to which you, Santa Claus, judge, us humans, yearly?

For all that I know: I respect my parents even if we argue daily, but it’s through arguments that better relationships are built, no? I do not kill, humans nor reputations. I do not hurt, enemies nor friends. I do not talk behind anyone’s back. I believe in Karma, yes; but I do not work on making it happen. When someone hurts me, I do not react. I sit and pray for him to recognize his mistake. When a boy breaks my heart, I wish him all the good of the world. When a girl backstabs me, I just take my distances without breaking our friendship. When people talk about me behind my back, I just think they are jealous and think by babbling they will ruin the reputation I have. When someone who hurt me asks for my friendship back, I welcome him with open arms. When I am having a bad day at work, I do not wish my boss dies in a car crash. When I am wrong I admit it because I expect people to forgive me, like I forgive them. When I love I love deeply. When I break-up, it takes me almost as long as a “facelift” to get over the relationship. I don’t desire what is not mine. I don’t lie (funny yes but I can’t fall asleep at night if I lie).

So Santa, I ask you… If the above is not the definition of being “good”, then what is?

Dec 22, 2011

Haki Neswein...

Tu connais la fille de Mounir, Notre voisin d'en bas? Yiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii ya haram ! Elle s'est évadée la nuit avec hayda jarna el souri de l'immeuble d'en face. ahla mich 3arfin chou baddoun y'oulo ! Elle leur a mit la tête dans la boue ! Même s'il a doctorat en économie le type, bass il est d'ailleurs et en plus il est d'une différente religion ! 

Yiiiiiiiiii ma khabbartik ? hayde Rasha sahabit rfi2na Rabih ! bass mich leb'in wlo, mich la ila houwe ! Ana déjà chifto ma3 baneit gheir. il les traite autrement. Ils paraissent contents bass ana je suis sure qu'ils ne le sont pas. darouré nse3ida, c'est notre amie wlo ! 

Khalil 3am byedhar 3a marto hoda ! Oh mon Dieu! Hoda, marto la Khalil, msahbé Fihmein el dikkanje d'en bas! W Fihmein bidallo yitkhena' ma3 sa fiancée Maha. je parie que bientôt ils vont annuler le mariage ! Ya haram ya Maha. 

Hayda killo ? 
Haki niswein ! 

C'est dans les grands salons de Beyrouth que petits et grands décident d'échanger les dernières nouvelles. 
Rien du monde de la mode, de la culture, du tourisme. Pas un gramme de politique ou de sociologie. Pas une conversation à propos des derniers changements climatiques, ni des problèmes écologiques qui affectent l'ozone.  à Beyrouth, nos sujets « in » ce sont les voisins, les amis, la fille d'en-bas, le garçon d'en-face.  Nos sujets « in » c'est nous même. Une méthode de drame personnel, d'auto destruction je dis. pourtant chez nous, c'est « in ». 

Parfois je me demande si les auteurs de « Dynasty » ou « The Bold and the Beautiful » n'avaient pas de gènes libanais ! Mais voila, notre Nisa' fil assifa (pour ceux qui regardent encore Télé Liban) n'est pas assez différent ! 

L'horreur !

Dec 11, 2011

The friend of my friend is my friend, etc.

I stand in the middle of a fight between two friends and I wonder, whom side shall I take?
When one is wrong, it’s easy. You point his mistakes and support the other.
But when it’s personal, what do you do? Whom do you support?
Worst… when the fight is between them two and concerns them two only… where do you stand?

Someone once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who judge everyone according to their previous acts and people’s talks and those who think everyone is good until proven otherwise.

I belong to the second kind; for me, everyone is good until proven otherwise.

But aren’t we all half angels and half demons? Don’t we all have our positives as well as our negatives?

If two of your friends (a boy and a girl) are dating (one another!), and they break-up. Whatever the reason is, you’ll still be friends with both, right? If he cheated or she hurt him, it’s their problem. They did not match. They hurt one another. You might take sides or give your opinion. But your friendship is not affected with neither. Because you know that, deep inside, separated from one another, each of them is good in a way or another. And if they can’t tolerate one another’s presence and want to act childish after their break-up? Oh well… you see them in separate places, at separate times… sometimes without even telling the girl you saw her ex-boyfriends or vice versa.

Then why does it have to be complicated when two decide to break their friendship? Why do you have to take sides in the friendship decision itself, not just the fight?

I stand in the middle of a fight between two friends and I wonder whom side shall I take?

In the absolute middle, I say.
Not a step to the right, not a step to the left.

The friend of my friend is my friend. The ex-friend of my friend can be my friend.

But the enemy of my friend? Well he can never be a friend.

That theory, the one about not judging people for being bad until they have proven otherwise to us, is true… the one about everyone having an angel and a demon inside of him too… so is the theory of friendships being a match, like couples.

But we can’t forget the famous old saying: Learn (or at least try to learn) from other’s mistakes.

Dec 2, 2011

Not all my blogs are for you!

“Mr. Luck, can you be my friend for a while?”

I’m addicted to social media; I keep my BlackBerry with me at all times, update my picture and personal message according to my mood, state of mind or thoughts; I do the same on msn and Facebook; I blog; I’m thinking of starting to tweet… I even believe Linkedin is the only network that I tend to keep private and professional (Though many of my contacts surprisingly don’t!).

While all of social media addicts act this way, they tend to forget that sometimes we set a picture or a status just because we like it, we share a blog or an article just because it is objective and good to read.  And while most of the time we want to deliver a certain message to someone, some rare times we want to deliver no message to anyone.

From a psychological point of view, when someone feels offended or concerned, it is because he relates himself to the subject.

Let’s take an example:
Post a display about missing someone, the message will be delivered to this person probably because he/she will feel concern (if you feel a status or a display is addressed to you, then it probably is). 
But it doesn’t stop here!
It’s now your chance to uncover all the nosey people on your list (who didn’t talk to you for the past 2 months) and will ask you now, “who do you miss”?

And another example:
Post a display about disappointment and find out who’s nosey enough to ask what happened, who’s caring enough to ask for help, and then above all, who feels he disappointed you.
Oh well, he’ll simply feel concern and show worrying in your display more than anyone else!

I won’t lie and say I’m an angel here! I often use my displays and personal messages to deliver a certain idea, feeling or message… not because I’m too weak to say it directly, but because some things are better left unsaid (to avoid arguing with people we love, but who still upset us). 

But if things are better left unsaid, it doesn’t mean the messages shouldn’t be delivered at all!
They should be delivered, just not said!
And those who feel concerned? 
They will understand them…

When I blog for instance, I accept subjects and ideas from many of my friends: I debate it with them, reach a conclusion, and write it down.  Sometimes I write down what they cannot write (for a reason or another).  Sometimes I blog for them, not for me; some of the subjects I wouldn’t even debate or put down in public myself.  But even when I do so, I keep a touch of myself in them.  Because my blogs are personal.  And the conclusions?  Well they always hold a piece of my heart.

While I make sure my blog contains no names or public content (and never will unless with the consent of the second party), I cannot deny that my blog is about myself. 
And myself means my life.
And my life contains my friends (present or past).
And my present and my past make my experience.
And my experience gives me life lessons.
And valuable life lessons make good writing material.
And good writing material is blog material!

Today I blog.
I blog for myself.  Because in writing I express my deepest thoughts.
I blog for my friends who enjoy reading what I write.
I blog to deliver my way of thinking. One that might be different than others. But just as good as others!
I blog to share my experience with others, interact with friends and readers, share opinions…

When I change a display picture, set a personal message or a status? It’s just like when I blog…

I’m not here to tell you how to read or what to think. 
When you feel targeted? You probably are (whether I know you personally or not).
When you don’t, read between the lines because you probably are.

You know…
Opinions don’t have to be the same, we can debate.
I love debates! (as long as I win at the end).

So my social media update, they are for you, him and her. 

But at the end, none of us is the center of the universe.
And my updates, not all of them are for you!